Nau mai te hapa, ma te hapa ka ako

Patua te taniwha, whakama he!

Welcome the mistakes, it’s from the mistakes we learn

Hit away the shy monster

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Key Moments

• Irene defined Imposter syndrome as - doubting your ability and what you have to offer in terms of the role you are given

• When there is a mismatch between what the role is and what you think you need to be in that role, is where things can unravel

• Imposter syndrome can cripple you, where you’re second guessing what you are doing and as a result, over-compensate 

• Who’s voice are you hearing when you are sitting in Imposter Syndrome?

• Cultural voice can be a strong presence that plays into Imposter Syndrome

• Irene poses “What would it be like to not be an Imposter? What would it look like? What would it feel like? What would you be doing?”

• Have you overcome Imposter Syndrome when you change the dominant voice in your head to be your own? When I can check in and give myself permission to stop.

• Imposter Syndrome is perhaps considering how many spoons you have and not to spend them all before you go home

• Knowing all of these things are easy but the actual doing is hard. This is where it is good to set good processes around looking after yourself

• Imposter Syndrome can creep into every aspect of your life - am I a good enough mother/teacher/partner/friend etc

• Need to consider how this constant drive/over-compensating is affecting others in your life

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Post Discussion

• When you’re comfortable with things, you often don’t feel Imposter Syndrome

• Negative self-talk holds us back & we often over-compensate where we don’t feel like we’re doing a good job unless … (insert your condition here) 

• It’s important to check the story that tells you you are not good enough

• Imposter Syndrome often shows up when you are moving up the ladder and taking on new responsibilities outside of your previous experience

• If you’re feeling like you’re uncomfortable and don’t know enough, it could be that you need to learn more - do something about it

• Imposter Syndrome has the ability to cripple you - personally and professionally - to stop you fulfilling your potential and it can be an ongoing battle

• Corrinne poses that if she’s not feeling like an imposter, she’s not pushing herself enough and it’s a sign that she has settled for being comfortable

• Book - Unf*ck Yourself - poses that people often don’t see your thoughts or intentions, but do see your actions. Taking action/steps towards being who you want to be, you will be able to show up with your best

• Undoing the negative self-talk takes concerted effort - what are you going to do about it?

• Even in the hard times, it’s important to be resilient so that even in hard times, you can find the right people to help you through

• In the classroom, do we know and consider who our tamariki’s go-to people are and do we give them enough access?

• Knowing when to back off the pressure for yourself is really important, or when to reach for help

• Tony Robbins - there are no negative emotions, they are just action signals. When you receive a particular signal, you need to ask yourself - “do I need to change my perception, or my procedure in this situation?” Your perception - how you’re thinking about something, or your procedure - how you’re going about something. Ignoring an action signal makes it louder and more intense until you really have to pay attention!

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Strategies

• Go to the people who will give you the right support - someone who can give you a ‘loving reality check’ to help with the positive self-talk

• Set and stick to healthy boundaries - make them deliberate, conscious, and regular

• Actually listen to your go-to people when they remind you to self-check in if they feel you are overstepping your own boundaries - it’s a signal to stop

• Engaging with a life coach has been beneficial - giving you a non-biased perspective, one that is challenging to discount

• Having her husband collect her at 5pm from school so she can’t just stay and get lost in work

• Surround yourself with good models

• Create your own success criteria for your role

• Being open to and vulnerable about receiving the feedback from others in order to make necessary changes

• Be open to learning from people around you and give yourself permission to not be the expert if you are at the start of your journey!

• Be aware of when you are feeling Imposter Syndrome in your life and challenge yourself to do something about it

• Ask ‘who’s voice is this?” and critically evaluate it to see if the story is relevant or accurate

• Check in, do you need to change your perception or your procedure, then take action

 

Resouces to Dive Deeper

Mel Robbins podcast - Silencing your self-doubt (audio on Spotify)

Tony Robbins - Master Your Emotions (audio on Spotify)

Unf*ck Yourself - Get out of your head and into your life - Audiobook on Spotify

James Knottingham - The Learning Pit (YouTube video)

Mana Potential - A strengths based approach

 

Acknowledgements

Irene - Interviewee

Corrinne Devitt- Co-Host, Scripting, Interview coordination

Ve Grant-Lawlor - Co-Host, Music Creation, Recording, Production, Editing, Publishing, and Summary notes