The Power of Connection: Supporting Wellbeing Through a Trauma-Informed Lens

I enjoy watching Good Sorts and Good as Gold—programmes that spotlight everyday New Zealanders doing extraordinary things. Last week, I watched an episode about a woman working with young people. There were no flashy interventions, just a calm presence, deep empathy, and genuine connection. It got me thinking: this is what truly changes lives. The way she listened, held space, and stayed steady reminded me that, as teachers, our greatest power lies not just in what we teach—but in how we connect.

In the hustle of education—curriculum changes, deadlines, assessments, planning, and ever-increasing need—it’s easy to treat connection as an “extra.” But here’s the truth: connection is not optional. It is the foundation. Without it, learning doesn’t stick, relationships don’t deepen, and wellbeing cannot flourish.

Trauma-Informed Practice: Seeing with Compassion

Many tamariki arrive at school carrying invisible backpacks—full of experiences, stressors, and trauma that shape how they show up in our classrooms. Trauma-informed practice helps us respond with empathy rather than judgement. Instead of asking “What’s wrong with you?”, we learn to ask, “What’s happened to you?” and “What do you need?”

Through this lens, we see behaviour as communication. A dysregulated child isn’t being defiant—they’re doing their best with what their nervous system can handle. Trauma-informed classrooms prioritise:

• Predictable routines and calm, safe spaces

• Co-regulation strategies instead of punishment

• Trusting relationships built on respect and consistency

• Flexibility, patience, and curiosity

These aren’t just good teaching practices—they’re essential for inclusive, healing-centred learning environments.

Te Whare Tapa Whā: A Holistic Lens on Wellbeing

Sir Mason Durie’s model, Te Whare Tapa Whā, provides a powerful way to understand and support wellbeing in our ākonga. Like the four walls of a wharenui, each element needs strength for the whole person to stand tall:

• Taha tinana (physical wellbeing): Feeling safe, healthy, and well-cared for

• Taha hinengaro (mental/emotional wellbeing): Feeling emotionally safe, able to express and regulate feelings

• Taha whānau (social wellbeing): Feeling connected and valued in relationships

• Taha wairua (spiritual wellbeing): Feeling a sense of identity, purpose, and belonging

Trauma can weaken any of these walls. Our role as kaiako is to notice where support is needed and create learning spaces that strengthen the whare—restoring balance, hope, and mana.

Connection Is Cultural

In Te Ao Māori, connection is not optional, it is a sacred value. Whanaungatanga, manaakitanga, and aroha remind us that every interaction matters. Our learning spaces become places of care when we uphold mana and see the whole child—not just their behaviour or achievement.

For many tamariki, especially those navigating trauma, just one adult who notices, listens, and stays calm can be transformational. These small acts—saying their name with warmth, offering choice, sharing laughter, holding space for their stories—build trust and healing.

What Does Connection Look Like in Practice?

Connection doesn’t require extra time or resources—it requires intentionality. Here are some simple, impactful ways to build it daily:

• Greet each ākonga by name with warmth

• Take time to check in when someone seems off

• Offer voice and choice in learning tasks

• Share moments of joy—stories, smiles, silliness

• Sit alongside instead of standing over

• Know when to offer a break, and when to just be present

You don’t need to be perfect—just present. It’s your steadiness, not your strategy, that matters most in moments of challenge.

Final Thoughts

The power of connection cannot be overstated. As educators, we have the privilege of being steady, safe bases for our children and young people—especially those who need it most. When we embed trauma-informed practice, guided by the wisdom of Te Whare Tapa Whā, we move beyond managing behaviour. We nurture healing. We support growth. We restore hope.

Let’s keep prioritising connection. Because in the end, it’s not the content we teach that students remember—it’s how we made them feel.

He aha te mea nui o te ao? He tangata, he tangata, he tangata.

What is the most important thing in the world? It is people, it is people, it is people.